And the more I think about today’s events, the more angry I become.
If you follow me on Facebook privately, you have gotten a little bit of the story and if you follow my 365 photos, you will have seen some of this as well…
I am so angry I can barely see straight (and therefore might not put this in the most eloquent way).
Today, I picked Will up from school and the moment I tried to buckle him into his carseat, I knew…
I was in for a “real treat”.
Will was in a mood,
and by “mood”, I mean absolutely NOT in the mood to go shopping.
He began to pitch a royal fit as we drove away from the school and continued to scream, kick and hit at the window until I reluctantly drove through the McDonald’s drive-thru and got him his beloved chicken nuggets.
I gave in because…
I knew I had to drag him with me grocery shopping and I was hoping I wouldn’t have to literally drag him.
We arrived at the store and with a few nuggets in hand, I strapped him into the cart and entered the store thinking that if I walked briskly I might make it out before he finished eating.
That was not meant to be.
As I placed my last item in the cart, he started.
Screaming “No! No! No!”
I handed him his chewy and told him I knew he was mad and we would be done soon.
He threw his chewy to the floor and started to cry.
I quickly walked toward the register as I tried to console Will and I could feel the eyes all over me and feel my stress building.
As I rounded the dairy aisle, an older woman stood in my path.
I walked past her quickly and Will shoved is shoe off to the floor.
As I turned to pick it up, I thought the woman was going to grab his shoe and hand it to me, but instead she shook her head at Will and said to me,” Perhaps you should try parenting your son.”
Who does that!?!
I know people think it, but who the hell actually walks up to someone, a stranger, and says it!?
Unlike my normal, semi-reserved self, I didn’t hold back and said,
” He’s severely autistic. Thanks for the judgement, you *sshole.”
and I walked away.
My blood was boiling.
And Will was still crying,
unaware that he was just insulted.
I got to the registers and decided I would just scan my own groceries because I didn’t want to interact with anyone else and while I rung items up and put them in the bags,
Will unpacked them and threw them to the ground. (it’s comical now when I picture it)
Frustrated, I picked it back up, told Will to stop and behave, that we were almost done;
and I finished ringing us out.
As I walked past the cashiers standing by the self check-out registers, I heard one cashier say to another, “Spoiled rotten brat.”
I spun around with the cart and spat,” What did you just say?”
They looked at me stunned and said nothing.
“That’s ok. You can’t say it to my face? My son is not spoiled. He’s autistic.”
and I turned around and left.
I got to the van and I was shaking.
had finally stopped crying and was singing one of his favorite songs,
unaware of anything but the beauty of the world around him
and I was struck with just how sad this world still is to those of us that aren’t autistic.
We see the world in black and white, happy or sad, fat or thin, rich or poor.
Autistic people just see beauty, in everything.
(even when they are frustrated)
I sat in the van in the parking lot allowing myself to decompress and listening to my now happy son talk to the birds, the sky, the trees… anything really that would listen.
And I thought, how sad that all those people in the store could see was the surface and not the amazing little boy that lies within.Judge not that ye be not judged. ~ Matthew 7:1
And, if you too are fed up with the judgement, check out these items I created (while fuming 😉 )