You know, I’ve been trying to think of why I am having so much trouble coming up with time to write and it occurred to me tonight as I was standing in the kitchen trying to cook dinner and Emma kept coming in and bugging me to play a game, or Barbies, or kitchen set, or anything really that it isn’t a time issue, it’s subject matter.
Or, subjects that matter.
It occurred to me tonight as I told Emma to find one of her brothers or sister to play and she responded with, ” But no one wants to,” and I realized, she’s right.
My kids have all grown up and, for the most part, they are in their own worlds.
My six oldest kids are busy with “their lives” and tend to just do their own thing most days.
And that is a huge adjustment for me.
And for Emma.
And while I would love to say that Keith or Will play with Emma, the reality is that neither of them do.
So even my three youngest are “on their own” most of the time.
It’s sad.
I think back on when my 6 oldest were little and every moment was spent together and how I wish I was blogging back then because the things we did together were just… so much fun.
And now, I sit and think, what do I blog about?
So I end up feeling like I only write about Will or my marriage and I’m just not sure what else to really say.
And, I realize, it’s sort-of a cop-out to blame it on my kids growing up because we did just recently celebrate Emma and Will’s 6th birthday and threw them a cool Pirate themed party.
And I know I could go into details about the fun games we played and the food I made, but honestly, I just don’t feel like it. (if you’d like to see more pics, check out my album on my Facebook page)
It’s made me question if my blogging days are numbered.
Or if blogging is period because I know I’m not alone.
I do know that there was a time when it took up a huge amount of time in my life and it came between Russ and I and nearly ruined our marriage (and that was before his affair). He would complain about how much time I spent away from him to blog and I would literally write him off and now, post affair, the last thing I ever want to do again is have blogging form that wall again.
And so, I guess what I’ve been doing is just writing when it’s really something that needs to be said instead of just saying it and hoping it matters.
And now, I’m rambling….
Ah, poor Emma, it’s hard, Brian gets lonely too, with no brothers to keep him occupied.
I think that’s my problem too – the children are growing up and they are at school all day. They still do and say funny, amazing, interesting, cute things but I am usually so caught up in the before-and-after-school rush that I don’t think to stop and jot it down like I used to (and most days I can’t find my diary or a pen that works or a pencil that is not blunt!).
Oh how I miss the days when my 6 Big Kids were little . . . and oh how I wish that we had had blogs back them (or even computers).
My 6 Big Kids are 22-28 now . . . and living across the country and around the world.
My Young ones are 10, 11, 12, 13, 16, 19 . . . and the 19 year old even moved across town.
Life is just oh so different now. I, too, wish I had all of the “cute little kids” to take pictures of and to write about. I always envisioned a house full of grandkids once my Big Kids were grown . . . but the grandkids don’t live close either. So sad. So hard.
My 10 year old is also really struggling with being the youngest . . . with the big kids “doing their own thing” . . . with the bigger kids living so far away. He leads a very different life than they all lived, surrounded by a house full of siblings to play with.
Hoping our blogging days aren’t numbered. I think that we “older women” have a whole lot to offer the younger women.
Hugs!
Laurel
It’s so hard when our kids grow up because life changes for everyone. Same thing happened here! Blogging has become a job and there are some days I’d rather leave it or have it be more personal. It will be interesting to see how blogging changes over the coming years. Nothing stays the same.
It does remain a good base for communication and memories. But blog when ypu need and want
Life is definitely changing…busier, hectic, and less ‘milestones’ to share. I’ve been pretty quiet on the blog-front lately too…just too busy and nothing much exciting. But I’m not ready to give it up yet and definitely glad for the many memories my blog has documented!
Looks like Will and Emma had a very fun Pirate party!! Our bday is just 3 weeks away (no big plans though…)